It should make me sad for her, but in a way, not even knowing your great-grandmother, I'm envious of her. Hearing this reminds me of what my family just doesn't have, and probably never will have. We're back-stabbing, hateful, and oft as not batshit insane. We have hardly any possessions between us, and what we do have we lord over each other rather than sharing. Some members of the family seem to do nothing but try to hurt other members, and my tiny, two-person branch has done nothing but try to pretend that we don't have a family. I found out not so long ago that my grandfather died, and had been dead for some time. I'd known him, but I didn't cry or anything, I just sort of went, "Well shit, Grandpa Sam." Mostly I felt guilty for knowing some unsavory details about his life that made me less sympathetic towards him.
It's more than that she apparently reached a ripe old age, and reproduced to boot. It's more than that she had a grave waiting for her with her family, and that she had a house and an organ and stability. It's the peace in this picture, the mutual love, that makes me feel very sad when I think of my own life.
And even this post. You miss her, but you're not torn open in pain, you're not angry, you're just loving and respectful towards her. How beautifully gentle.
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Date: 2006-09-21 08:59 pm (UTC)It's more than that she apparently reached a ripe old age, and reproduced to boot. It's more than that she had a grave waiting for her with her family, and that she had a house and an organ and stability. It's the peace in this picture, the mutual love, that makes me feel very sad when I think of my own life.
And even this post. You miss her, but you're not torn open in pain, you're not angry, you're just loving and respectful towards her. How beautifully gentle.